Favorite Person

People with BPD pick favorites. A favorite person in BPD can be someone we have unrealistic expectations of that we heavily rely on. My favorite person is usually whoever I'm dating. Currently it is my ex boyfriend. Unfortunately, a favorite person relationship is usually a toxic one. We basically expect them to be there for us every second. We feel like we cannot live without them and need their validation. An example is calling them excessively because you haven't heard from them for a few hours. There is also something called "splitting". We either see the favorite person as good or bad. Something small may trigger us and it can completely change our view of them, but then we calm down and they're perfect to us again. The favorite person is the most important person in our life. We care about other people too, but it isn't the same kind of relationship. The best advice is to make yourself your own favorite person. This is really hard and I haven't gotten there yet, but I know of people who have. I hope this helps someone understand if they're in a favorite person relationship. Please feel free to reach out anytime to talk.